26 June 2008

The dogs' bollocks

Murphy is a ham. I don’t think that one could be more of a ham even if they were a pig. He is seriously full of himself and enjoys it every minute. The dogs will go swimming in the lake to chase toys and afterward Murphy comes bounding out and off into the tall grass, as if he’s running only because he knows he can go fast. But he’s a sweetheart and, boy does he know how to suck up to a girl. Of course, my heart melts for him and his puppy dog browns. But he’s a bad boy and has selective hearing. Murphy and Abby have their fun together chasing birds and rabbits and squirrels. They do their own thing and run off at every opportune moment. It can be kind of stressful keeping an eye out for them when I don’t know if they are running for fun or to hunt. Darling Katie is always by my side, though, because of her arthritis she can’t keep up with the others, so instead keeps me company. She walks in my shadow and is sometimes in the way, but I help keep the flies off her head all the same. Sometimes we are four and others five. Maggie has her own agenda and sometimes likes to stay in the barn and sleep. Never the less, we follow almost the same route everyday.
Then there are times, like today, when these dogs are going to be the death of me. Murphy and Abby decided that it would be great to go off the property and cross the road to get to the reservoir. I didn’t even know that they could get that far, but apparently this place doesn’t have a fence around the perimeter. And for some reason none of the dogs have collars or tags. Murphy and Abby were off and one of the barn managers told me he saw them on the hill across the road. So, I jumped on my bike and whistle and yell for the scoundrels. After a half hour of searching, I start to freak out. What if one of them got hit by a car?! What if someone took them to the pound?! With tears streaming down my face, I called their names at the top of my lungs. Damn Dogs.
I was scared for their lives. But mine was a subject of thought too. If you lose the dogs you are taking care of isn’t that kind of a FAIL?! Not easily explained, at least not to this lady. Anyway, after another ten minutes they finally came and were severely scolded. They both had bristles and pieces of wilderness stuck to them and all I could do was sigh in relief and anguish. Luckily, I wasn’t late to my dentist appointment and needless to say the dogs stayed in the house the rest of the day.
Conflict Resolved.


22 June 2008

Time to Think

This week I have had some good time to think, being alone will do that to a person. It's lonely out here and the fact that it's unfamiliar makes it harder. I love the dogs but there is a certain unconditional love that comes with owning your own pet. Picking up after a dog has left a surprise in the house seems easier when the animal is yours. I guess that's how parents feel about their kids, just a million times more.
I've been thinking a lot about college and how much my life is going to change. It's strange cause up until this summer I couldn't wait to get away and leaving "L-town" seemed like it couldn't come sooner. But I have so many memories here. Now that it's finally time to accept that I'll be leaving, it's a lot harder than before. That doesn't make up for how lame it can be but to think that after college I might not live here anymore, it's weird. I've lived in the same town, in the same house, for 18 years.
I know billions of people have gone to college before me and been fine, but the more it's on my mind the larger than life it feels. I know I'll leave and it will be hard at first, but I'll overcome and everything will turn out okay. There's just a part in the back of my head that fears the hardship and keeps me wondering if I will always struggle with separation. From every difficulty an opportunity can arise. Although I don't yet know what opportunities I will come across, I am hopeful that if I listen, my prayers will be answered and a beautiful life will unfold in my path.

19 June 2008

Cats and Crops

I was reading the British news today and I came across an article about a new crop circle in Britain. It is the most complex crop circle in that part of the world and when it was decoded it signified the first ten digits of pi. Whoa. That's crazy. So was it made by aliens or some other intelligent form of life? Kinda strange to think about, anyway, check it out:

What I really wanted to write about was the cat that I'm taking care of out here, Bucki. He's cool. He loves attention! A good scratch on the head is what he lives for and when you stop petting him, he'll just walk away....but after a few minutes he's back. But this time its for revenge. He will latch on to your arm and bite you until you start petting him again. It's playful and adorable. He looks innocent and sweet but its soon discovered that he's crazy.
There are three other cats but I'm not responsible for them...they eat the mice in the barns...theoretically. Really they're just lazy and the barn manager feeds them. Here's Bucki:

17 June 2008

Dias de los perros

Hoy en dia, he sido cuidado los perros de mi jefe. My boss is moving to Texas soon, so she left me in charge of her house and dogs for a week and a half so she could get some things straightened out. I've been here a few days and I wish it was over already. I'm too far out of town to leave a lot and she wants me here as much as possible to keep an eye on the dogs. She's kinda a strange lady and her house is creepy. But the dogs are great...at times... and the surroundings are beautiful. The dogs are a pack of rascals, four big sweethearts. I can't help but love 'em and even when their hunting instincts get the best of them I can't scold for too long. Anyway, I'll introduce you...

Murphy is the only male of the group and he seems to be a leader. He's very independent and acts just like a teenage boy. He's a big hunter and thinks he's pretty crafty about chasing down animals. But Murphy is a big baby and would do anything to get a tummy rub.

Katie is the least likely to chase an animal, but she will chase her toys.She's the oldest and has a minor case of arthritis. She loves the water and would swim to get a toy all day...until she passed out. She's a lover and the alpha female. She loves attention and is loyal to the hand that throws the toy.

Abby: High energy. High Metabolism. Rambunctious. A born runner. She's the smallest of the pack but she makes up for it with her speed and endurance. None of the others can ever keep up with Abby cause she just keeps on going. Like the energizer bunny. She loves water too, not as much as Katie, but she would just like to swim around and watch the others play. She loves to lick faces.

Maggie is a sweetheart, she's independent, but she knows who to suck up to. She's a hunter and is very patient about it. She will sit under a tree for an hour waiting for a squirrel to come out of its hole. She's the only one who won't play in the water, might get her feet wet but that's as far a she goes. She seems to be the most responsible one of the dogs and has the most privileges. She's a wanderer but is always back in time for food.

16 June 2008

Stress related questions

Anxiety. I can't help that it eats away at me, from the inside out. I don't like stress, especially in the summer. I should be free sailing and loving every bit of life. But responsibility is a killer. Why does everything have to matter so much?! Can't I just forget for one day?
This move is gonna be harder than I'd imagined. I'm gonna miss my family...my mom especially... my friends and my dog, Sparky. Mom says he's gonna die of a broken heart once I'm gone....it breaks my heart to know that it could be true.
What's the deal with this "money", "ecomonics", and "gas prices". Psh, why does it have to rule our lives? I wish it was as easy as putting those terms is quotations and suddenly make them unimportant.
And boys. Who are they anyway?! Gosh I wish someone could answer that question for me!! Hormones suck. the end.
Why do some people have to treat teenagers so unfairly, as if we have no concept of respondsibility or or importance? I feel competent, not as much as someone twice my age or anything, but I have people to testify that I can hold my own. Maybe some people are just stubborn...or have a stick up their butt...or both.
In any case, I've been doing my best to trust in a Greater plan, but I have seem to have control issues. Giving things up was so much easier even 4 years ago, my how things change.

10 June 2008


Last week I got my cartilage pierced with an industrial bar and my mom hates it. The day I got it done she didn't talk to me. Besides her acting childish about it, she has all of a sudden been acting really unfriendly and distant, not at all normal for my mom.
I had an interesting and eye-opening conversation with my friend/mentor/boss, Ann. When I explained my mom's change she wasn't surprised at all and told me a story about some struggles that she had with her mom way back in the day. She reassured me that my mom is just having a hard time with the fact that I'm leaving for college and this act of "disobeying" just forced her to accept that.
I've always been the most independent of us kids, I think sometimes that's hard for my mom because I'm also her baby and only girl and she wants me close. It's hard for me to see my mom act this way though, especially knowing I'm the cause. We've always been tight, I'm lucky for that. But as I start a new transition, it changes the relationship we've always had...I hope it makes it even stronger.


08 June 2008


Recently, I was introduced to the TV show "Freaks and Geeks". It was a show that aired in 1999 and only had one season. Really, the show is the best thing ever, I think it just came too early to truly be appreciated. Anyway, the show is about these high school kids, the freaks and geeks as you could have guessed, and their daily lives. It is so easy to get wrapped up in these fictional kids lives (especially w/o commercials) and want to act like their conscience or step in to help with their problems. It's so easy to judge from the outside, to be able to apprehend the bad stuff. It makes me wonder if I was in a TV show and people watched what I did and said...what would they warn me about or urge me to do? And on what standards would they make judgments? Really I have a lot of people to be considered outsiders, but rarely do I see one of them shaking a button-box at me telling me that Daniel is a bad guy and he's just using his bedroom eyes to manipulate me. The influence of my friends and family is subtle, I guess because I've gotten used to it, but it's the reason for who I am. I don't often think about the minute decisions that I make so quickly that have a large effect on me...strange but true.
Now my head is going a million miles a second remembering many different instances of small decisions. Too easy to get sidetracked.


05 June 2008

Rainy Day

I've been pondering the best way to make this blog unique and creative but haven't had any brilliant ideas or original thoughts on the subject. I guess I'll settle for being average and just write.

So I'm sitting here in my new rain boots, trying to decide if they are really comfortable or not. I don't really know what rain boots are suppose to feel like on my feet and the rubbery-ness is kinda throwing me off. But the rain is another story, it's so simple and natural.
My favorite kind of weather...
in certain allotted amounts.
Cleansing, liberating, serene. Although, it does prevent me from going on bike rides (safely) and scares my friends out of frisbee or a walk around the lake.
Never the less, its a good time to sit in a coffee shop and people watch or snuggle with a blanket and read an enrapturing book.
Or run around and dance in the rain like a child...which probably sounds the most appealing.
Being a fresh high school graduate, I suddenly feel the need to be a kid again. To remind myself of the wonder years, of Wonderbread and wonderment. Cause growing up is scary. I can't wait to get away but there are just some things that tug on my heartstrings and hold me back ever so slightly.
*sigh* I think that dance and then blanket are calling me. :)